i LOVED SOMEONE FROM THREE YEARS. I LOVED HIM FROM THE BOTTOM OF MY HEART. I ASKED HIM AGAIN AND AGAIN TO GET MARRIED BUT HE ALWAYS SAID MY PARENTS DONT AGREE EVEN IT IS A FACT THAT HE NVR HAD GUTS TO TALK TO HIS PARENTS. I DID THE MISTAKE OF HAVING SEX WITH HIM. BUT I SWEAR TO ALLAH PAK THAT I NEVER WANTED SEXUAL RELATION WITH HIM.BUT HE ALWAYS SAID THAT I SWEAR TO ALLAH LA ILAHA ILLALLA MUHAMMADUR RASULULLAH I WILL MARRY YOU. I BEGGED HIM THAT DIONT DO SEX WITH ME. BUT I WAS FORCED TO DO SO. EVEN WHEN I WAS 5 YEARS OLD MY UNCLE(MY MOTHER'S BROTHER) SEXUALLY HARASSED ME FOR 2 YEARS. SINCE THEN I WAS BADLY BADLY ADDICTED TO MASTURBATION. AND I WEEP SO MUCH AFTER DOING MASTURBATION. I TRY SO HARD SO HARD TO GET AWAY FRON THIS BUT I CANNOT DO ANYTHING. WHEN LAST RAMZAN STARTED(2012) I AGAIN ASKED HIM THAT I DONT WANT TO DO ZANA AS THIS IS KABIRA SIN SO I WANT TO GET MARRIED. AND HE JUST SAID LA ILAHA ILLALLA MUHAMMADUR RASULULLAH MY FAMILY IS MAKING MY RELATIONSHP WITH SOME GIRL I CANT MARRY U. I WAS SO BROKEN THAT I STOPPED TALKING TO HIM. I DIDNT TALK TO HIM FOR THE MONTH OF RAMADAN. AND ON EID HE STARTED CALLING ME AGAIN, HE PUT TOHMAT ON ME THAT U CALL PEOPLE IN UR HOME AND DO SEX WITH MANY MEN. MY MOTHER KNEW THAT I LIKED HIM. I PUT MY HAND ON THE QURAN PAK AND SWEARD THAT IT IS A LIE I HAVE NOT DONE ANYTHING. BUT HE DIDNT LISTEN, HE CALLED MY BROTHER AND SAID TO HIM THAT UR SISTER IS DOING SEX WITH SOMEONE. SHE GOES TO DIFFERENT HOTELS. NO ONE TRUSTED ME. NOW IM SO DEPRESSED I HATE MY BODY THAT WHY I WAS SO WEAK TO LISTEN TO HIM AND HAVE SEX. I WEEP EVERY TIME AND MY BODY DOES NOT HAVE ANY ENERGY. I SHIVER ALL THE TIME. I HAVE DONE TOBAH TO Allah but i dont know what TO DO? I WEEP SO MUCH THAT MY EYES ARE HURTING ALLTHE TIME. I DONT KNOW WHY ALLAH DOES NOT PUNISH HIM FOR DOING ALL THIS TO ME? WHAT SHOULD I DO?I PRAY 5 TIMES AND ALSO DO TASBIH ALL THE TIME. BUT MY PAIN IS NOT DECREASING. THERE IS NO SINGLE MOMENT WHEN I DONT THINK ABOUT HIM. I STILL LOVE HIM SO MUCH. I CALLED HIM I BEGGED HIM THAT PLZ COME BACK TO ME BUT HE IS NOW HAVING ANOTHER GF AND HE JUST SAID YOU ARE A PROSTITUTE YOU ARE A DIRTY WOMEN. PLZ HELP ME WHAT SHOULD I DO TO FORGET HIM?WHEN WILL ALLAH PUNISH THAT ANIMAL?WHY NOTHING BAD HAPPENED TO MY UNCLE WHO TOOK MY VIRGINITY?WHY IS MY LIFE LIKE THIS?plz i cant bear this pain

asked 101 Rabia%20Khalid's gravatar image

Also, what your uncle did, Allah is there to punish him... Dont waste your life bcoz he did wrong! Allah will punish him but dont punish yourself!

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answered 655 Bubbles123's gravatar image

Salaam... Wow your goin thru alot! Ill tell you abit about myself... I fell in so called LOVE with a guy, a very practising guy who respects women alotttt! These 2 things actually made me love him... Life seemed perfect and we wanted to get married... He wanted to engage in haram activities and i was like whattt this is not what i thought u was! However, time went on and we coz close not phyiscally just got to know each other alot more... I wanted to marry him and slowly i realised he isnt what he seems... He literly changed so much well i guess thats how he was and i got to see his real side! I cried sooooooo much!! Life felt like hell... Just a few weeks ago i commented on a blog and realised that i was crying over a guy who isnt even worth it! Also, i was acting like what is happening with me Allah and what did i actually do... I spoke to him which is haraam and yet i was asking Allah why this is happening to me and why the guy is not being punished... Why do we do haraam and say why is this happening to us!!!! 2 weeks ago i began praying tahajud and i cried and asked Allah for forgivness and asked Allah to change my heart as in i dont even think about that guy... 2 days i prayed tahajud and i hardly ever think about him!!! What your going thru is not easy and me and everyone saying do this and that, its easy for us to say but to actually take it on board can b veryy difficult! But trust me its worth it! I didnt go thru what you did but i understand! Dont call ur ex and watch he will realise he did a bigg mistake!! But dont go back to him bcoz hes not worth it! Pray to Allah truely from the heart and watch everything becoming soo goood! Life is really short and sometimes we forget our purpose of life... Sometimes our problems feel like hell but what we dont realise is that the activities we are actually doing r taking us to hell and that hell is not even a 1% of what this so called hell is... I really hope this helps!!! May Allah guide you inshAllah... Tc

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answered 655 Bubbles123's gravatar image

listen, you have to be strong , dont tell anyone about it, but keep it a lesson for you that in the future dont fall easy for men,and dont do it again. from your story i guess he didnt care about you, he just said it to have sex with you, and he knows for sure that if you did, you cant do anything.... I blame your uncle because i almost have the same story. just be smart for next time, if a guy told you that he care about you it doesnt mean he really care about you, dont care about about any people because its a waste of time.

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answered 814 armky's gravatar image

Excuse me did you say

"I DONT KNOW WHY ALLAH DOES NOT PUNISH HIM FOR DOING ALL THIS TO ME?"

You did wrong with yourself with your choice and now asking Allah to punish him for you? Girl are you confused or what?

And as far as you are praying 5 times a day, I want to tell you that these are obligatory prayers. And you pray for your own good and your prayers give nothing to Allah except your obedience. Prayers only make you a Muslim, prayers are not the only thing a muslim should do. Have someone told you that when you prostrate in front of Allah you make a promise that you will submit yourself to Allah, meaning you will do things what Allah told you and you will not do haram things yet you still love the same guy. Girl you are not sincere to yourself and that's why your pain is not decreasing.

I got it what you want, you know completely what you have done and I think you know the punishment for your this sin and now you want Allah to not punish you? And you pray for these reasons,

  1. That Allah will not punish you.
  2. You want that guy to feel pain, if that guy will not marry you. And if that guy will agree to marry you than all is well.
  3. You pray and ask that no one [Specially your family and frnds] will find out what you have done.

And you only blame your Evil Uncle that because of he, you started masturbation and this is all due to him, you think your evil uncle is responsible for whatever bad happened in your life.

I pray that your evil uncle will surely taste pain, in this life and in hereafter. This is my only sympathy with you but for the rest you are responsible.

Now what is the cure for your pain?

Answer: Honestly its very hard but as far as my knowledge, 100 lashes is the only cure and surely after that you can say to yourself "now I am free and forgiven" then you can re-start your life, free from the punishment of this sin. I would advice you to discuss this with a Female Alima, who doesn't know you or your family and friends and lives away from your home. And ask her to purify you, meaning ask for 100 lashes. That's it

I don't know you girl but as far as you call yourself a human and Muslim, I really pray from the bottom of my heart that you will not have to feel the pain in hereafter.

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answered 1.2k16 believer's gravatar image

my sister,my fried,salaam aleekom.first of all,i admire u for having born in a muslim home.i realy realy admire that and i wish i was born in such myself.second,about your boyfriend or let me say your ex boyfriend,do not let your feelings control u,give your life to allah,he knows whats best for u.who knows maybe he has prepared something better for u than that boyfriend u are crying over.seek first the kingdom of allah and everything else will be given to u.remember every good gift comes from allah.i have lost my friends,am about to lose my job because of my new religion(islam),but i dont care because i love and fear allah now.dont wish for worldly things,everything that happens in your life was ordainned by allah so pleaseeeeeeeeee my sister forget about that man,and pray for him,dont wish bad lucky for him.peace of advice NEVER EVER EVER OPEN YOUR LEGS FOR ANY MAN EXCEPT YOUR HUSBAND,dont open your legs for your hands to MASTURBATE.HARAM

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answered 11919 khadijah's gravatar image

Your uncle that harassed you will be punished by Allah In life and at judgment day. His sin will be not a crime of sexual sin but even more

The hell your living is your own hell. How can you love someone still when he clearly just wanted you for pleasure.

Move on. And give your heart to Allah. And you will find no more need or urge to love him.

Repent tobah and pray for Allah's forgiveness. For he is forgiving.

And most important thank Allah and be grateful everyday that you are still well and still able to ask forgiveness.

Lost hope in life and people ? Doesn't matter. Dont loose hope in Allah. If you ask why Allah doesn't punish him ? Don't! Because Allah will punish him and no deed evil or good goes unseen by Allah. If you asked for towbah then why did you call him back and ask him to take you. Remember rzq (wealth) and naseeb (marriage) was written by Allah on every Muslim before they were even born.

Be patient. The longer you are ... the greater your reward.

Except any human being to hurt you or use you. But Allah will never hurt you. He knows what's best for you.

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answered 1603 petrolhead's gravatar image
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Asked: Dec 22 '12 at 09:00

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Last updated: Dec 23 '12 at 18:24


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