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Thank you for everyone who commented. I have sorted my life out and moved to live alone with my daughter and have gone back to my studies.

asked 815 ummaysa's gravatar image
edited Jun 05 at 14:47

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Walaikum Assalam sister, My heartily sympathies are always with you. I seriously have lost words but all i can say is tht May Allah guard you and your respect forever.

Sister, first of all, such type of marriage is condemned by almost all religions. Islam orders men to fear Allah in regard of treating women/their wives. I dont understand why your father did this to you. But hats off to you tht even after suffering, you didnt disobey ur husband.

Try to connect yourself with Islam deeply. Indulge yourself in understanding Quran and offering Namaz, believe me it affects a lot because by practising such things, a person gets closer to Allah and when a bond is created between Allah and His creation, then nothing can disappoint him. Sister try to forget abt the past. Everyone who reads this has his sympathies for you. May Allah Bless you and you continue to prosper and your daughter also flourishes under your motherhood. Ameen

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answered 1084 azeem's gravatar image

Salam,I really dont know what to say. You are passing the worst phase of your life.I can not give you a islamic answer but from the humanity point of view all i can say that horrible injustice been done against you. I would suggest you to go to a islamic centre or mosque to talk to some mentor in PERSON so that you can get the islamic way to improve your situation.May ALLAH bless you.

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answered 2013 tyh's gravatar image

@tyh jazakAllah khair. thank you for replying . i have spoken to a person at a masjid . i am just waiting for them to get back to me on this Insha'Allah khair. May Allah bless you to.

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answered 815 ummaysa's gravatar image

you may think you are passing through the most difficult time,but there are others who are far worse than you.only allah knows whats good for you.inshaa allah everything will be well with you.i cant advise you on islamic grounds,but i can only tell you this:BE PATIENTE,ALLAH KNOWS EVERYTHING.

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answered 12419 khadijah's gravatar image

yeah i know some people have been through more diffciult times than what i went through. may Allah ease what they are going through. and im being patient and trying to stay to my deen thank you for your comment sister

(Feb 05 '13 at 06:53) ummaysa ummaysa's gravatar image

asssalumulakum dear siister I can never imagine something like this would ever happen, My heart sank with tears. Be wise and tough because allah swt loves those that are patient and allah swt test those that he loves and no matter what, keepp tighly ahold of your iman because that will be the only thing to keep u moveing. My heart goes out for u and ur daughter and i ask allah swt from my dear heart to help u and ur beautiful daughter throught the difficult time. Just remeber sister when u fell al alone in this world and theres nobody to count your tears allah knows. Every tear drop that in yur precious heart allah knows so be mindful of allah and allah will be mindful of you be grateful to allah. Your a strong person; read quran because the quran is a guide, the quran is ur companin through the hardships. It will smooth ur heart in so many ways u cannot imagine. WALLAKUMASSALUM

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answered 45211 miliser%20saloo's gravatar image

thank you so much. may Allah accept your dua . the subhanallah the quran eases any type of hardship. im trying my best to stay strong in my iman and read quran as much as i can. thank you so much for your advice

(Feb 05 '13 at 06:55) ummaysa ummaysa's gravatar image

Salaam Sister... I just would like to give a message to all women that they shouldnt go through all this torture... If ur husband started abusing you then leave him... Dont make Islam become difficult! Islam doesnt say ur husband is everything and what ever he does to you its fine... Why do women even have this thinking? Sister what you went thru was alot and hats off to ur strength! May Allah help you and guide you... Dont be afraid of ur husband... In the UK theres so much help given! So much support offered! Make use of it...Live your life your only 20! Give you daughter ur full attention and give her a life worth living! If you need any supprt then u can contact me... Tc

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answered 6517 Bubbles123's gravatar image

wa salam. i dont know why women think like that. its probably what they get put into their heads by some people. thank you so much for your reply and advice . may Allah accept your dua.im doing everything to keep my daughter happy and give her what i never had. jazakullah khair sister .

(Feb 05 '13 at 06:57) ummaysa ummaysa's gravatar image

DEAR SISTER, ASSALAM U ALAIKUM !! MAY ALLAH GIVES YOU HAPPINESS AND FORGIVES YOUR'S AND YOURS FAMILY EVERY SINS.

SISTER I APPRECIATE YOUR PATIENCE, MAY ALLAH HELP YOUR FATHER , MOTHER AND YOUR DAUGHTER AND U. SISTER I WANT TO GIVE AN IDEA OF ACTIVE RESPONSE, IN HANDLING SUCH PEOPLE AND GIVING A SUITABLE RESPONSE TO THEIR ACTIONS.

1ST POINT : BE INDEPENDENT , DO NOT DEPEND ON HUMANS, ONLY TRUST ON ALLAH.
2ND POINT: FORGIVE YOUR FATHER , AND ALL THOSE WHO HAVE INSULTED YOU AND THINK TO HARM YOU.
3RD POINT: BE HAPPY , CUZ HIGHER THE RESPONSIBILITY , HIGHER THE REWARD. THIS ALL EVENT REFECT TO A GREAT START JOURNEY TO THE ENDLESS LIFE, SO BE HAPPY.
4TH POINT: OFFER SALAH AND GIVE UR QUESTIONS TO ALLAH.
5TH POINT: TRY TO TAKE CARE OF YOUR HEALTH, I DONT WANT TO SEE YOU ILL OR TENSE OR FEELING ANY PRESSURE OF LIFE, GENERATED BY BAD HUMANS. YOU MUST PRAY FOR THEM.
6TH POINT: TRUST ON PEOPLE MAY CAUSE DAMAGE, THAT YOU CAN SEE.... SO LEARN FROM PAST, OR YOU CAN SAY LEARN FROM MISTAKES.

7TH: START WORKING SELF, SO YOU CAN FEED YOUR CHILD, DO NOT RELY ON OTHERS.

-ON COMPUTER, OPEN BROWSER -> GOOGLE.COM-> "ONLNE DATA ENTRY IN ...[UR COUNTRY NAME]".
-DO WRITE ARTICLES ON DIFFERENT TOPICS:
-GET PEOPLE HOW IN NEED OF WEBSITE DEVELOPMENT, ANDROID AND IPHONE APP'S, AND FORWARD IT TO THE SOFTWARE HOUSE. MAKE A DEAL WITH THE SOFTWARE HOUSE, WHAT CLIENT I WILL GIVE TO YOU, YOU'LL GIVE ME 10% OF IT.
-VIRTUAL CALL CENTERS. (IN MY PAST I WAS WORKNG FOR A CALL CENTER .. FOR UK PEOPLE ELEC AND GASS) FOR THAT SEARCH ONLINE CALL CENTERS OR HOME BASED CALL CENTERS.
-SALES AND PURCHASES.
- TEACHER AT SCHOOL

8TH POINT: SIS DONT AFRAID OF BLACK MAGIC, DO READ AYAT-AL-KURSI AND MAKE A HISAR, TRUST IN ALLAH THAT YOU AND YOUR CHILD WILL NOT BE HARMED BY THIS POOR THING.

9TH POINT: PLEASE DONT TRUST ANY PERSON DOING BLACK MAGIC, THAT I CAN DO THAT OR THAT. 10TH POINT: "ALLAH KI RAZA MAI RAZI REH K KHUSH HONA CHAHEYA" (URDU LANGUAGE) - BE HAPPY WITH LIFE. AND ONE MORE SAYING IN URDU: "ZINDAGI JIS TARAH LANDI HAI US TARAH LANGAE JAO" WORDS BY A PIOUS MEN I MET.

SISTER - I AM A SOFTWARE DEVELOPER , I WISH YOU DO PRAY FOR ME, TILL THE END OF UR LIFE. I REALLY NEED PRAYERS ALL OF U.

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answered 3014 Suhaib's gravatar image

Wa Alaikum Assalaaam Warahmatullahi Wabarakaaatahuuuuu..its quite paining after Reading the story..oh..Hats off..No Words..sister.. Sister,i suggest u to do Istikhaara..and In Sha Allah,Allah {S.w.t} will Surely help you.

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answered 1.2k517 Ubi's gravatar image

Sister, I do not have any answers for you but turn to Allah (swt) and pray for him to give you the strength and guidance to get through this time, they say Allah tests those that are strong enough to overcome such obstacles. I'm so sorry for what has happened to you,no husband or father should treat anyone in such a way.

Woman was made from the rib of a man, she was not created from his head to top him, Nor from his feet to be stepped upon, She was made from his side, to be close to him, From beneath his arm, to be protected by him, Near his heart to be loved by him.

"When she is a DAUGHTER, she opens the door at Jannah for her father. When she is a WIFE she completes half the deen of her husband. When she is a MOTHER, jannah lies under her feet. If everyone knew the true status of a Muslim woman, even the men would want to be woman. " Sayatha Afram Nadawi

Sister, I am keeping you in my prayers and hope that you find peace and happiness in life, and that you are treated the way you should be treated.

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answered 13118 Kdjesham's gravatar image

Assalamalaykum, I am so sorry to hear this. I hope that God will bless you. I am not an authority figure by any means, but everyone knows that these threats/death threats made by your father and husband are completely unIslamic, immoral, unacceptable and potentially dangerous. Please slip out as soon as possible and find a way to get yourself to a safe place and/or quietly call police to get help on leaving this situation in a safe way. I am not in the UK, but usually there are places of refuge for women and children in your situation. You might look online or so. For example, I found the link below. Perhaps it might help? http://england.shelter.org.uk/get_advice/homelessness/emergency_accommodation_if_homeless/womens_refuges You are going to be ok, but you need to leave asap to insure your safety. You and your child deserve all the best and you need to help make that happen.
Take care. I am sending my best wishes.

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answered 1011 butterfly's gravatar image
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Asked: Jan 22 '13 at 08:16

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Last updated: Jun 05 at 17:51



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