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here is a late father had a wish of me getting married to a paricular relative..due to some issues i hppend to get married to the elder son when d relation ws fixed by him wth younger..i couldnt deny coz i was convinced that it was elder one n i now i know that it wasnt true..m living with my husband unwllngly..couse he never tries to understand my feelings he is arrogant short tempered never talks to me lovingly n never compatible..m trying to accept him the way he is JUST CAUSE FOR THE SAKE OF MY MOTHER AND MY LATE FATHER..ive also seen my dad in my dream looking at me truely trying hard to make evrythng good.. another thingwas at the begginng after engagement my hubby had promsed me to send me to further studies n give me some time to adjust with him friendlily. i being immatured in thoughts had o misbelief that just by having sex once a girl gets i didnt let him touch me for a month but later everythng was convinced to me n i continued my relation with him n its two years of my marriage. finally im in a confusion that will i be sent to heaven coz i fulfilled my parents desire or to hell coz m not liking my husbands behaviour towards me. but i always try to be calm when he is hyper at anything. pleeeeaaasssseee solve my problem coz i want to be in haeven.

asked 104 zikra's gravatar image

please someone answer to my question may allah bless u with happiness.

answered 104 zikra's gravatar image

sister, you have fulfill your parents wish that is a good thing cause it is compulsory for everyone to obey parents now you are facing a tough time , just pray to Allah and astaghfar every day and ask Allah to put mercy between you and your husband and make love each other, InshaAllah everything will be fine with the passage of time and you will be happy . life is a test not a bed of roses, try to pass your test and sabar for the situation InshaAllah you will get a good results.

answered 1313 Alert%20Eyes's gravatar image

thank u bt ive an example like yesterday i was hurt accidently got severely burnt while cooking n when he saw he just askd what happened n said nothing else he didnt even look at my wounds even in d makes me miserable.

answered 104 zikra's gravatar image

sister, that is so sad , your husband should be kind towards you but if he is not ,try to forgive him and just live your life with sabar as long as you can if you love him, there is a chance that may Allah change his heart and he will be caring and loving in the future after realize your kindness and love and the things you did for him and didn't question about anything. dua is the only weapon you can use so try to make your home. separation is not the solution but if you think about it try to tell him your feelings and your sadness, that would be more better if you two live a comfortable life. before take any decision try to see if there anything good in him or he did for you. try to question yourself why he is doing like this, what does he think.

answered 1313 Alert%20Eyes's gravatar image

he aint able to forget the things i had told him at d beggining i had told many hurting words that i don love zabardasti se shadi karli n all...will i be put to hell for this???

(Feb 14 '13 at 05:39) zikra zikra's gravatar image

he forgave me but doesnt love me now v just eat together n sleep.thats all no understanding of feelings btwn us..what shd i do i get scared to talk to him coz he nly gives negative answers..plz help me outta this..

(Feb 14 '13 at 05:42) zikra zikra's gravatar image

You have to be cautious with him so as not to offend your he really the one your father asked you to get married to. If yes exercise patient with him.and no tell your mother about it. And you can go for divorce by notifying and explaining your situation to a scholar. Always do what your parents ask you to do.because. ROSULLULAH SAID: ALLAH'S MERCY IN THE MERCY OF YOUR PARENT AND ALLAH'S ANGER IS IN THE ANGER OF YOUR PARENT.i.e if your parents are happy with you ALLAH SUBHANA WAT'ALA IS also with you and vice -versa.

answered 259312 abdulrasaqtoheeb11's gravatar image

brother i have heard that it implies more to for a women her husband plays major role n without his permision i cant even meet my parents..m main problem is i fulfiid my parents desires but failing to make my hubby happy coz of his arrogance n land up ultimately in hell n my completion of duties towars parents are in vain na..;'(

(Feb 14 '13 at 05:47) zikra zikra's gravatar image

not loving husband but tryin to stay calm n obeying him for the sake of allah wll take me to hell?

(Feb 14 '13 at 06:18) zikra zikra's gravatar image

thank u brother..but he aint the one n mt mom knows abt it but stl she gave my hand to him thinking of the insecured world..m tryng tomake it calm n simple btwn us he is very ignorant n stares alot angrily at me m tolerating it just to meke our future good..m still not blessed with kids..i personally feel that he aint having the intention of child before mating with me..:( m scared that il be put to hell by allah for my sins..

answered 104 zikra's gravatar image

apki shadi ko kitna arsa hua hai ? jo keh dia so keh dia us pr afsos na karen koshhish karen k ap k husband ap k love ko accept kr lain or dua karen, shaitan sab se zyada khush tab hota hai jab huaband and wife main fight hoti hai.. ap InshaAllah janat main jaen gi ap bohot caring hain, ap k husband apko maaf nahi kr rhy yahan unki ghalti hai apki nahi, ap bas dua karen or jahan tk ap se ho sakay apna ghar bachain.

answered 1313 Alert%20Eyes's gravatar image

you are trying to make him happy but if he does not that is not your fault, and you will not go to hell cause he is not happy. well sister may Allah help you and solve your problem. your test of life will end soon. you have to decide that you will live him with sabar or want sepration, its your choice and your life.. and you wont goto hell for the things which are not belongs to you, going abroad for study is a big issue after marriage even i cancled my studies for the marriage too, don't sad for not complete your study, good relations are more important then anything.

answered 1313 Alert%20Eyes's gravatar image
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Asked: Feb 10 '13 at 06:30

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Last updated: Feb 14 '13 at 18:35

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