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how do i deal with strict parents? i feel like i don't really can do anything or get my say in anything and it makes me soo mad that i stop praying try to stop pleasing them which is really bad... i understand others have it worse but i really can't be my true self or have any fun since i am the last child. thank u x

asked 102 Rokaiaa's gravatar image

Brother/Sister ....

Solution is very simple and very easy. Lets see.

"Higher the responsibility - Higher the reward". Your parents might get annoyed by you or you annoyed by them. First make a list actions and response, like : (for example)


Action : father asks me work in harsh manner. Response : in conveyed my anger through my angry eyes, and say yes or no. or Response: i see into their eyes, feeling love with their attachment and thanks to Allah that He has given you some1 who cares for you and asks you something.


Second On every night make such actions and responses.. do remember you have to highlight where is the clash, once you identified the clashes on specific ways, make a check list. like: (for example)


Father Actions (that disturbs me): [tick] Ignorance. [tick] Harsh way of talking [tick] Not worrying for my future.

Father Response (that disturbs me): [tick] abusive talk. [tick] not includes my opinion.

Brothers Actions (that disturbs me): [tick] Always Get Favored by other family members. [tick] dont care for you.

Brothers Response (that disturbs me): [tick] dont give respect

My Response (that distures others): [tick] when i shout [tick] ignorance on issue

My Actions (that distures others): [tick] not participating..


Third Now you have all the reviewed scenario. make sure dont include shaitan (devil) whispering in your mind, during any decision making. - dont be self pity. - always see where this path will ends. (if u sacrifice in order to give a good response to your family , though their response is not good enough then that is sure That Allah Taellah wants to give you a chance to prove yourself to be the best - this is a question of an examination of life).

Final Step Brother never accept that you're on right side always. Make it your hobby to smile for the sake of other. Help others in the name of your parents so that Allah Taellah give them good rewards for shaping you.

BE BECOME A GOOD EXAMPLE, AND BROTHER I FEES YOUR JOURNEY OF LIFE, FULL OF HAPPINESS. DONT WORRY. OFFER SALAH , AND DONT EXPECT FROM PEOPLE, EXPECT FROM ALLAH.

MY PRAYERS FOR U. ALSO PRAY FOR ME, I AM ALSO IN A PROBLEM. AND NOT FINDING MENTAL PEACE , PLEASE DONT FORGET TO PRAY.


MENTAL PEACE

HELP OTHERS TO GET MENTAL PEACE, SUPPORT OTHERS TO GET MENTAL PEACE, AND IN ALL DONT EXPECT THAT ANY1 WHOM U HELPED MUST PRAISE YOU, MUST ALSO HELPED YOU. NOO.. HELP THEM SILENTLY. WITHOUT LETTING THEM FEEL OF IT. AND ALWAYS EXPECT FROM ALLAH.


TASBEEH FOR YOU BROTHER

  • AAU ZU BILLAH HE MINASH SAITAN NIR RAJEEM - READ THIS 12 TIMES IN MORNING AND 12 TIMES IN EVENING.
  • AFTER EVERY SALAH - 1 TIME AYAT-AL-KURSI.
  • BEFORE SLEEPING - 1 TIME SURAH MULK. OR IF POSSIBLE SURAH YASEEN
  • FULL DAY WHEN FIND TIME : READ SUBHAN-ALLAH , ASTAGHFIR-ULLAH.

AND REMEMBER ME IN UR PRAYERS. PLEASE DONT FORGET.

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answered 3014 Suhaib's gravatar image

Why would you stop praying? you pray for Allah and not them. Anyways...

Your parents are always right even when they are wrong (except when they tell you to commit shirk). Try doing this in a respectable manner. Don't simply live up to their expectations, go beyond that and they will themselves take note of your maturity, and will grant you far more independence. We often see kids revolt and take stances against their parents, and this is not at all acceptable. Why not go against their expectations by exceeding them, and remember to always do it in the sake of Allah, if they notice, then it is just an added benefit. Yes it will take a lot at first, but the end result is best for you and your parent, inshallah.

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answered 11115 Khal_7's gravatar image
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Asked: Feb 26 '13 at 02:37

Seen: 1,087 times

Last updated: Feb 26 '13 at 18:24



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