As Salamu Alaykum,
I feel like Allah is testing me, and I feel like there are so many tests at once. I've been rejected from my top 2 school choices and had to settle for a school I didn't want to go to, I wasn't allowed to get any cords/sashes or didn't receive any awards to wear along with my graduation day, and I mustered up all my courage today to see if there was anything I could do but I couldn't. I prayed so much and so hard and for so long and fasted to get into my dream school and I did everything I could do get in but in the end, even with how much I prayed and how many times I asked Allah for me to be accepted into the university, I was still rejected. Every time I feel a bit happy recently I just slip back into a state of anger and sadness, and I can't get rid of this feeling. I don't want to ask Allah why but it really hurts. I don't want to question Allah, nor will I, but it still hurts. I've tried to move on but it's extremely difficult. I feel like I really disappointed Allah somehow and He is not happy with me. Even as I am typing this I am crying so hard. What happened to my prayers/duas?
How do I get rid of this feeling and keep getting closer to Allah? I don't want this feeling of regret and sorrow to take over my life and keep me away from Islam.