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I know you can lie to save your life, but can you lie to save yourself from being abused or scared of being abused?

asked 153 YasmeenS's gravatar image

can you be more specific about the type of lie?

My answer will be from a christian perspective anyway so will probably differ from the islamic one. I guess from my perspective, as a christian I believe Jesus died on the cross to allow god who is 100% just (and therefore cannot just ignore sin or let it go unpunished) to make us humans righteous again and able to come to him as righteous and forgiven people.

From that point of view, I believe god forgives my sin, when I geniunely repent and ask for his forgiveness - as a christian we believe that to think that we have to do some specific further action to 'earn' forgiveness is saying that jesus's sacrifice was not enough (ie kind of an insult).

Anyway - I think that if you tell a lie, or committ almost any other kind of sin, and then you are geniunely repentant and regretful (so geniunely wish you had not, and really truly wish to not commit the same sin, in the same situation in future, then god will forgive you.

However for the most part - people would think of lies, as being lies told for personal gain, - but not for defense - so people who might lie to their employer saying they are sick when really they just want a day off work, or lie to a freind because they dont want to attend the friends party - or lie and say they did not drive their car over the speed limit because they dont want a ticket...

However your question doesnt seem to fit at all within that sort of situation.

You say lie to save your life is ok - what situations in islam would this be ok?

And what situation would a person need to lie to avoid being abused or threat or fearof abuse?

And are there any other ways to avoid the posible abuse aside from lying....

And of course what kind of lie is it? Is it a big lie, such as denying god? or a harmful lie such as blaming someone else for a sin you committed and letting them be punished, or what is known as a 'white lie' in western culture - for example, you go to dinner and a friend arrives and they are wearing a dress and you think "that dress looks awful makes them look fat, pallid, or whatever" and then they say "oh how do you like my new dress I saved up for it for months and finally had the money to buy it, isnt it wonderful?" and a white lie would be you saying "Oh yes thats a lovely dress" so you lie to avoid hurting their feelings, but you are still lying.....

Anyway I believe if you truly repent god will forgive you for any lie. But the thing is when you lie - you give Satan a legal foothold in your life - and you also separate yourself from god, just a little, and those things might mean that you start to find it more difficult to pray to god, or to geniunely repent, and then from there you can end up in real trouble.

So its not so much the lie - but what it might do to you.

If you have not yet told the lie, and dont want to (which I am guessing you dont - hence why you have posted here for advice) but you cant see a way to avoid the abuse you refer to, without telling a lie, then why not take the entire situation to god in prayer and ask him to show you a way through the situation that will save you from abuse and not put you in a position where you must lie...

Or saying to god honestly "if it is not in your plan to save me from this particular situation and abuse, well you know me, so you already know that i am afraid and don't think I can endure this abuse and that I will be very tempted to lie to avoid it.... - if it is your plan for me to endure this, please give me the strength and courage to tell the truth and endure whatever follows. and please send angels to surround and comfort me as I endure, along with a sign now, so I can feel sure I am doing what you want me to be..."

I think all you can do - is to be honest with god - ironic as it sounds lol - (about the fact that you are afraid you will tell a lie if you are faced with abuse for telling the truth) - god knows you and what you can endure, and cannot, and he may just wish you to place your trust in him, -

Also consider this: By thinking that you have to lie to avoid abuse - you are saying that that you have to determine the outcome of this situation - you are denying any possibility that god who created everything is able to come in and change this situation for you - in a way that means you don t have to lie, or get abused

Maybe god is seeking your faith - the faith where you say - I cant see a way out of this, but I will trust in you god, that if I follow your will and don't lie, you will protect me from harm and abuse - or allow me to endure it and learn from it - so i don't need to try and solve this dilemma myself, because you can solve it even when it seems impossible to me (as i write that I have a distinct feeling that god actually is pointing that very thing out to me too!)

Maybe if you can place your trust in god, you will find that he will save you from the abuse, and you wont have to lie to escape it..... It might look as though there are only two options for you - tell a lie or face abuse but god is god, and is not limited by the things we humans are - even if you can only see those two options, faith is believing that god is totally capable of bringing about a 3rd option in this solution - the one where you don't tell a lie and you don't get abused.

What god wants most of all - in order to draw you close to him, is your trust - and to truly trust him, you have to give over to him situations like this, where there is a possibility that something bad can happen - because that is how you find your faith and trust in god - by letting him take over a situation like this, and trusting that he will not allow anything outside his plan to happen to you.

Thinking that the outcome must depend on whether or not you lie,is kinda saying that you don't believe or trust god to manage this situation for you, that you have to personally fix it yourself rather than entrust it to our creator.....

Maybe even the first prayer you might have is 'god I want to trust you to sort this out for me, but I cant - please help me to trust you so I can turn this over to you rather than trying to solve it on my own....'

(Now maybe I go and try and follow my own advice! nods heavenward)

answered 152 foundit's gravatar image
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Asked: Jul 01 '13 at 17:40

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Last updated: Jul 02 '13 at 13:29

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