Asalaamu Alaikum Shaykh, I hope that this message finds you well and I hope you would be able to clarify a matter for me concerning my marriage. Five and a half years ago when i wasnt practising Islam, I got married to non practising Muslim guy. I now have two children alhamdulilah and have been practising for a while now. Unfortunately my husband and I haven't been together for nearly two years and he sleeps in a separate room in the house (we live with my in-laws). When i asked him about this he says he feels claustrophobic. Roughly six months ago we had a big argument and out of anger and frustration I made him agree to divorce over text message. We didnt talk for over a month until he got a new job and told me about it. When i asked if we were together he said yes.....but nothing changed....he refused to talk about it, no physical contact, stays in separate room. Unfortunately this had happened once before after my first child. There is basically no relationship left and since a silly argument over a month ago he refuses to speak to me. Its turning nasty and now he makes indirect comments in front of his family and uses my children to this effect. I have come to the conclusion that I need to draw a line under this and my in-laws also agree that i have made enough effort to resolve this. Could you confirm if the second divorce stands and if i am in fact still married how i go about getting a divorce from a guy that refuses to speak to me or anyone about it. I have done istikarah a few times regarding this and from what limited knowledge I have I believe we are not meant to be. I look forward to hearing from you. Jazakhallah Khairan. Nafisah
Wa Alaikum Salaam Sister
It seems to me that your husband was mad at the time and wasn't aware of his actions so the divorce is not vaild so you are still married.
Are you sure you want to divorce?
The prophet ( sallallahu alayhi wasallam ) said, "for any woman who asks her husband for divorce without anything wrong being done the scent of Paradise will be forbidden for her."
Waiting for your reply