Assalam alaikum

I'm a Christian and I'm seriously considering conversion to islam. However, there's a number of things that make me hesitate.

Before anything, I acknowledge the possibility that I could simply be going through a phase so I've resolved to follow the lifestyle of Muslims for one year before I truly embrace islam. That would also force me to do my research on what I'm getting myself into.

First, I'm still dependent on my parents and previous interactions with them suggest hostility towards Muslims. Long ago, my parents mentioned that they would be proud if I became a priest, especially if I became pope. When I joked that maybe I'll be an imam instead, the conversation quickly became serious with mentions learning the techniques of bomb making. My mother's blood pressure is increasing lately and I don't want my conversion to be the cause of stress that would ultimately kill her. A recent bombing incident involving self-proclaimed muslim terrorists did not help matters.

My siblings are less of a problem: my sister is exhibiting atheist tendencies. My brother doesn't seem to care for that and only cares for blatant disrespect but my other sister reacted badly. She has shown the capacity for physical violence and taking matters of discipline into her own hands before and I fear for my well being if she finds out.

Next, I share a room with my brother. I've been trying to do my fard prayers including fajr but the dawn alarm is beginning to disturb him badly. I would prefer a more subtle approach. On that note, any suggestions in squeezing in dhur and asr prayers in school are welcome: they frequently overlap with prayer times. At home, when I don't have classes, I prefer to do it in my room when my brother is out drinking or working but my sister is becoming suspicious of me locking the door. Currently, I'm doing them in our warehouse but now she's becoming suspicious of my daily visits.

I know diet will be an issue as well. I've been trying to eat halal and Im known not to drink alcoholic beverages so no problem there. Unfortunately, at home dinner time usually consists of at least one pork dish. While avoiding it and going for something else is easy enough, sometime only pork is served. I've been making excuses not to eat dinner in such cases but I think my parents are becoming suspicious when I opted for the fish dish instead of my mother's pork chops: I'm known for my hatred of seafood. This will become especially problematic once Ramadan comes.

I know I can't hide it forever. I'm thinking of letting them know once I'm independent. Until then, any advice?

asked 4411139 UnknownUser's gravatar image

Respected Brother; what i concluded in your case is that although you want to embrace Islam but you have some concerns regarding your family's response to your embracing of Islam and again you have some problems regarding prayer timing. First,i want to congragulate you and let me tell you some of the Sahabas (companions of Prophet Muhammad PBUH) too faced similar case as yours so you can ,in my opinion hide it from your family.But if you want a solution than it lies in the Holy Quran and Ahadith of Prophet Muhammad (pbuh). second, regarding prayer, if you have some unavoidable circumstances, then it is allowed to combine the prayers of zuhr and asr. And my humble suggestion to you is to consult a scholar and read and read the Holy Quran and InshAllah You will find solutions to all of your problems.

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answered 10 Ibn%20Ahmad's gravatar image

It appears that the general consensus is to conceal my faith for now. It's becoming trickier at the moment though. For the past few day, only pork has been served for dinner and I skipped them all. I'm afraid they may become suspicious. I suspect it's only a matter of time before they force me to eat dinner which just so happens to be pork only. I seriously wish to keep my diet halal, at least for this year but at the same time I do not wish to expose myself unnecessarily and face the consequences and possibly a beating from my older syster.

(Aug 30 '13 at 05:02) UnknownUser UnknownUser's gravatar image

Can I ask are you old enough to live on your own?. If yes suggest you do. Because hiding it will last as q as Allah wills for you. Also the not eating pork thing you simply can research many diseases that come from eating it. And openly admit you no longer eat it. Also if your parents believe and read the bible you can use that to back you up on a lot of things. Also a brother here has a book called Hellenism I ask you to read it. He will send it to you via email. Let me know and I will ask him to send it to you. Salam

(Aug 30 '13 at 05:32) sadie ♦ sadie's gravatar image

a Muslim can eat pork in some cases like for example being in a place that there is no food except pork.. so eating pork is better than he die from hunger. (because more important is the life of human)

also, if someone is obliged/forced to eat pork while his heart is refusing it.

do not worry, step by step.. Allah will make after the hardship time ease/easiness. most important is your intention and relation/mind with Allah.

(Aug 30 '13 at 19:10) inclined2truth inclined2truth's gravatar image

wa alaikum el salam wa rahmatullah (and upon you the peace and the mercy of Allah),

Congratulation!! ma shaa Allah (whatever Allah willed).

I totally agree with brother Ibn Ahmed, yes you can keep your Islam in secret between you and Allah. Islam is easiness and not hard/extreme and our prophet(salla Allahou 3alayhi wa sallam) whenever he was choosing between two matters he used to choose the easiest of them. the most important is you intention which is your heart.. Muslims will be rewarded whenever he intends to do something good even if he could not. Allah will not judge you on something that is not in your ability.

we have islam(shahada, praying, charity, fasting and Hijj), and Iman/believing (in Allah, His angels, His Books, His Prophets and day of Judgment and the decree/fate).. and then the Ihsan(doing good on its best way.. to worship Allah as if you see Him, and if you can not see Him then (be conscious that) He sees you. doing good is not only in prayer and fasting but in every minute.. to avoid from the heart the bad manners; envy, arrogance, showy, selfishness, hateness... etc, and to improve instead the good manners; Love, forgiveness, thankfulness, knowledge, humble...etc

your smile in the face of your brother is rewarded by a good point, your kindness to your parents, bro/sister and neighbors and all people/creatures is from the good Iman.. your removal of something harmful from the road is one of the branches of Belief/Iman.. being clean is from the good Iman.. Loving for others what you love for your self is from the good Iman. Being merciful is from the good Iman, being well mannered is the most weighty actions in Islam.. remembering Allah in your secret...and making Du'aa knowing that Allah is nearer to you than anything and that He is Hearing Seeing Knowing Near replying Able generous merciful and forgiver... and truly sufficient to his servant. May Allah take care of you well taking your from the darknesses into His light.. and may He causes the reasons for your best.. He is truly the best ally and best disposer of affairs.

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answered 377116 inclined2truth's gravatar image
edited Aug 29 '13 at 18:44

Asalam-u-Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah Dear Brother; I agree that you have some concerns and let me assure you that Islam has solutions for all the problems. As i have requested you in my previous answer to go through Al-Quran and Ahadith,solution to your problems lies their only. Almighty Allah says in Quran that By the Time, Every human is in Loss, Except for those who have believed and done righteous deeds and advised each other to truth and advised each other to patience. I think your case has a solution here.Here are warnings, glad tidings as well as recommendations. And i request you to go through seerah of the Companions of Prophet Muhammad ( PBUH). And if you need some material, i can arrange for you. feel free to contact.

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answered 10 Ibn%20Ahmad's gravatar image

i think you should tell straight that i am a Muslim.. it is easier for you.How long u can hide how long u can suffer and Try to convince them about Islam & preach Islam .if they also convert its good or minimum IF they agree with ur Muslim Lifestyle in their house its OK but if they oppose ready for consequence u have to leave house/make ur own living .. they are spying u bcoz Ur family knows u r becoming Muslim and they r doing all this to avoid u become a true Muslim .

Thats why Quran Speaks Hereafter is Better than THis WOrld(Surah Hadid)

V 20 Know that the life of this world is but amusement and diversion and adornment and boasting to one another and competition in increase of wealth and children - like the example of a rain whose [resulting] plant growth pleases the tillers; then it dries and you see it turned yellow; then it becomes [scattered] debris. And in the Hereafter is severe punishment and forgiveness from Allah and approval. And what is the worldly life except the enjoyment of delusion.

V 21 Race toward forgiveness from your Lord and a Garden whose width is like the width of the heavens and earth, prepared for those who believed in Allah and His messengers. That is the bounty of Allah which He gives to whom He wills, and Allah is the possessor of great bounty.

V28 O you who have believed, fear Allah and believe in His Messenger; He will [then] give you a double portion of His mercy and make for you a light by which you will walk and forgive you; and Allah is Forgiving and Merciful.

V29 This is] so that the People of the Scripture may know that they are not able [to obtain] anything from the bounty of Allah and that [all] bounty is in the hand of Allah ; He gives it to whom He wills. And Allah is the possessor of great bounty.

BE BRAVE AND TOLD THE WORLD THAT I AM A MUSLIUM

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answered 1075 rehanalam's gravatar image

Hi, and Wa Alykum El Sallam

As to this situation bro, you are a Muslim now - so you do not have to say I want to "Embrace" Islam. The second thing is Muslims in their life face (Tests) and this is one of those tests, Allah all-knowing and all-hearing he knows you from your heart and has eternal knowledge of your future and destiny so Allah (Praise God) is showing you your strength this way. Even born Muslims face similar problems when it comes to growing a beard and going to the Masjid so you are not alone in such family-based inability to understand sort of situation.

Keep your prayers ON TIME, if you suspected that you will get into trouble delay it to the nearest possibility within its time frame, or (Allah is forgiven) it’s not you who want to delay, it’s the situation so no worries - Allah is too generous to not to accept it -.

Do treat your parents nicely as well as your sisters, especially, the one who likes to box things down her way - haha- sorry, they are your family and they have a great deal of rights upon you. Never let a smile leave your face, this will miraculously put all fires down - believe me – it has been tested and proved to work.

Stand tall to what you believe in; never forget what our Prophet had to go through in his life. The prophet (peace be upon him) had to leave his beloved Makka, was expelled, Years and Years of his life spent creating the Empire of Islam (JUST CREATING) before we have had a real entity that is counted for amongst the cultures of the world.

Again bro, STAND TALL – never let anything be a consuming problem but Allah’s love to you, never let anything take the most part of your thinking but how to be more loved by Allah. And ALWAYS remember, if all those who live on mother earth wanted to hurt you, they won’t be able to accomplish this unless Allah’s Wisdom allowed to happed. And if all those who live on mother earth wanted to help you out pray on time and take good care of you and your needs, they won’t be able to accomplish this unless Allah’s Wisdom allowed to happed.

May God keep you happy, safe, happy again and most importantly (A good Muslims),

Contact me if you needed anything: fhdtaher@gmail.com

Salam

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answered 353 Muslim%20altaher's gravatar image
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Asked: Aug 29 '13 at 06:45

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Last updated: Sep 02 '13 at 08:37


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