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My neice who is 7 years old is very short tempered and hyper. She disrespect her grand Mother and me and does listen to us even though we love her very much. Is there any dua which will help her come close to us and respect us and obey us. Plea help

asked 101 Zarakhan's gravatar image

Asalaamu 3Alaykum. I don't know a duaa that is specified for this. However I do know you can say your duaa to Allah any way you'd like. He knows best what you need and what's in your heart. Salaam

(Dec 10 '13 at 14:56) sadie ♦ sadie's gravatar image

Assalam Alaiykum, There are several possible contributing factors to be evaluated before trying to modify your niece's behaviour:

  • diet (high sugar, highly processed foods have a detrimental effect on a child's behaviour)
  • bedtime routine ( lack of sleep due to late hours cause extremely poor concentration aggravation and poor behaviour)
  • daily routine ( lack of it means that the child cannot predict the routine and therefore feels unsettled. Best homes are those that have a fairly predictable routine as this provides the child with a sense of security)
  • daily activities ( these should be balanced and consist of indoor and outdoor activities. Electronic media such as television, if left uncontrolled will negatively impact on a child's expressive language development, concentratio, etc)

  • rules ( children thrive best when they know what the consequences are for misbehaviour. It is best to develop these with the child by talking about acceptable behaviours and what happens if they are not followed. So, in a sense you form an agreement on rules and consequences. A consequence should be something that the child will not be happy about eg. 'You did not tidy up your toys so you miss out on hearing your bedtime story') It is really important to follow through with the consequence, otherwise behaviour control becomes ineffective.

  • behaviour of the adults (adults are role models. The way in which family members communicate with each other, the tone of voice, choice of words, etc all have an enormous impact on the way the child communicates. Adults have to remember that if they use bad language, speak harshly with each other and so on, it is quite likely that the child will imitate until it becomes a part of the child's behaviour. So model the right behaviour.
  • quality time (a child should be given some quality time each day, be it going to the park, cooking with a family member, reading, creating something, etc) Lastly, bringing up a child requires effort. It does not happen on its own. The more time and effort invested at an early age, the more benefits that the parents reap. Yes duaa is also recommended but sincer willingness and positive action are also required. May Allah subhana wa ta' ala guide you with this. Salaam
answered 5287 stronghold's gravatar image
answered 03 saleemkhan's gravatar image

Thank you all for your kind replies. Dua ki darkhast

answered 101 Zarakhan's gravatar image
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Asked: Dec 10 '13 at 14:43

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Last updated: Dec 14 '13 at 14:19

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