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Hello and thank you all for taking the time to look at my question and offer your advice.
I am not completely familiar with the Islamic religion and have continued in my learnings to understand it better and be a better Muslim. With that said, here is my issue at hand. I met and eventually married (religiously) a Muslim man because at the time we could not legally marry in the US as he was going through divorce proceedings with his wife. To make the story a little shorter, I accepted him and he me as husband and wife in Islam. We lived together for awhile, and it was made known to me that he had pronounced divorce to his wife 2 times years prior (in the same sitting), but this time I had nothing to worry about because he had completely divorced her as he had told her he divorced her 3x (again in one sitting). He said that he could not go back to her and it was haram and I had nothing to worry about, we just needed to get through the legal aspect of it. A few months later as we were doing the legal paperwork he came home one day and told me he could not divorce her and he would be going back to her because they share children together and it was what was best for them, especially because there is a little girl involved. Needless to say I reminded him he'd told me he divorced his wife and could not go back to her unless she was married to someone else...he told me he did research and that even though he told her he divorced her 3x it would only count as one (now mind you all my findings and study say that he has said it to her a total of 5x more than what Allah has permitted). So he went back to her, never divorcing me, and I became pregnant with his child about 4-5 months later. After our child's birth he moved with her to a different state, but still keeping in contact with me (of course in secret from her because he does nt want her to take his children away from him and move back overseas) and I have also travelled to see him several times. I try to tell him he is living in sin by being with her after divorcing her, but he doesn't listen...he also tells me he is treating me properly becase he sends me money and I am taken care of though I don't see him barely. Well, next thing I know he's supposed to come back for our childs 1st birthday but he never shows up and doesn't return phone calls or texts for almost a week...his phone even is shut off. He tells me I stress him out by telling him I miss him all the times and I need to stop inshallah things will work out and hes not going to not come home to me. But, where do I stand? I was never divorced and I cant reach him in any way..

asked 101 sashad's gravatar image

hello sister, I tink u should sit him down nd talk 2 him about ur pain, make him realise dat u ar nt happy with his attitude. If he really loves u, he will find a better way 2 be with his children without being with his former wife. Bt if he continue like dis, then u should get a divorce cus dat means he doesn't care abt u nd he doesn't deserve u. A true muslim wouldn't hv done wht he did.

answered 153 asmau1996's gravatar image
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Asked: Jan 24 at 14:03

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Last updated: Feb 14 at 09:22

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