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Salam , I have a 14yr old daughter who was raised in islam and went to a islamic frm pre-k to 8 th grade the Islamic school did not ofer 9th grade and up so I put her in a public school a 2 days ago I found out that she was dating a boy at her school and sending him naked pictures of herself ......my question is how do I go about handling this the Islamic way what is my first step.....my husband dont want her in the house again its our only daughter ...plzzzz help

asked 101 lostnhurt's gravatar image

Please do not take decision in hurry, you can punish her easily but can not divert her in same way.. She is not a big girl may be her friend had make her abuse after all in 14 she is quiet innocent to understand the sin or bad.

Ask her dad to keep sabar, in sha allah allah will show some path, you both can not leave your child in this way whether she one child or more..

If any matured girl or women may make this kind of act it is understood but you can not take same decision for your 14th old daughter.

if you will leave or ignore or see with guiltness definitely she will not go on same way again but she must have complaint for you that i was innocent or make sin in childness but you my parents was not child who left me alone...

May allah solve your problem and show you a right path..

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answered 201 shakil%20rangrez's gravatar image

Dear sister This is the critical age where the action and her moments cannot be controlled by harsh words or beating her up, as these acts seems to be more energetic, fun, and more loving. So be more friendly to her, show mothers love is greater on this earth and allah's love is most greatest ever. Daily make her sit beside you make her read quran with translation and make her read hadith and ask her explain every single line, but don't bore her taking long sessions and make her do 5 times salah. Stay with her during nights say her bed time stories about our prophets and sahabis, and the worldly acts and haram acts in sight of allah. This should be done daily till she understand what is good and bad. Its all your patience and dua you can change her. Nothing is impossible. Allah bless your family. Aameen Shouting beating hating does not help but the situation turns more worse, handle gently as careful as glass, either u can shine it or u may brake it. A child should shine take care.

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answered 151 meerabai's gravatar image

I am extremely sorry for you. I don't believe that her faith is strong enough. I am also 14 and I went to public schools my whole life. I have seen other Muslim girls date but I never dared to do so because its haram and because I could never disappoint my parents. from what your daughter has done you must punish her so she knows not to ever do it again and so she knows what is right and what is wrong. tell her what will happen if she continues to do things like this, for example tell her what happens in hell or something like that. I myself have recently been reading a lot more about Islam and I have found many things that happen to sinners and Alhamdulillah I have never done such a sin. but pay more attention to her at an age like this girls get influenced but a lot of things. who know what she might do later on. I hope everything turns out fine Insha'Allah.

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answered 102 muslimah18's gravatar image

Please do not take decision in hurry, you can punish her easily but can not divert her in same way.. She is not a big girl may be her friend had make her abuse after all in 14 she is quiet innocent to understand the sin or bad.

Ask her dad to keep sabar, in sha allah allah will show some path, you both can not leave your child in this way whether she one child or more..

If any matured girl or women may make this kind of act it is understood but you can not take same decision for your 14th old daughter.

if you will leave or ignore or see with guiltness definitely she will not go on same way again but she must have complaint for you that i was innocent or make sin in childness but you my parents was not child who left me alone...

May allah solve your problem and show you a right path..

link
answered 201 shakil%20rangrez's gravatar image

Dear sister This is the critical age where the action and her moments cannot be controlled by harsh words or beating her up, as these acts seems to be more energetic, fun, and more loving. So be more friendly to her, show mothers love is greater on this earth and allah's love is most greatest ever. Daily make her sit beside you make her read quran with translation and make her read hadith and ask her explain every single line, but don't bore her taking long sessions and make her do 5 times salah. Stay with her during nights say her bed time stories about our prophets and sahabis, and the worldly acts and haram acts in sight of allah. This should be done daily till she understand what is good and bad. Its all your patience and dua you can change her. Nothing is impossible. Allah bless your family. Aameen Shouting beating hating does not help but the situation turns more worse, handle gently as careful as glass, either u can shine it or u may brake it. A child should shine take care.

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answered 151 meerabai's gravatar image

The parents now days treat our deen knowledge, which is the quran and sunnah, as a grain of salt, and stress on straight As in studies (example). But where will your As avail you in the hereafter? Only your deeds count!

Yes i am good student but was a poor muslim. My parents rarely stressed on our deen and study was all that i ever heard of. I realised i was deaf dumb and blind when i gained islamic knowledge. I corrected myself, gained sense and then i am now also becoming a hafiz. I became from devil to a momin Allahmdullilah.

Its the tortures of hellfire which changed me as part of improving islamic knowledge.

If you havent groomed her on that knowledge then this is what you reap.

You need to improve her knowledge and practise islam in entirety. Inshallah there will be change.

Last resort might be to teach the boy some lesson. Tell him marriage is no fun and will he become muslim and marry?

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answered 8588 abdul_wasay's gravatar image
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Asked: Apr 09 at 01:37

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Last updated: Apr 10 at 12:32



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