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Assilamoalaikum I've been married for 8 years it was completely arranged marriage and we don't have kids because we don't really have physical relationship. I've tried everything to solve this I was over weight I lost weight, I was shy I overcome that as well. I tried to talk to him so many times but every time I talked to him about it he got angry at me and start shouting and all. I am living at in laws and they always gave me hard time for last 8 years I've been so patience about everything but now I just had enough and I really want divorce from him but just because its the last option in Islam I am hesitating just wants to know what you guys think is it alright to get divorce in this circumstances? Thank you.

asked 10 Aonymous's gravatar image

Can you take divorce?

Valid reasons for divorce are taken from onislam.com:

  1. Physical, mental, or emotional abuse or torture. When one of the spouses becomes abusive and inflicts physical, mental, or emotional torture, and is not willing to change by taking practical measures through therapy or counseling, then it is a valid reason for seeking divorce, for the Islamic principle states, “There shall be no inflicting or receiving of harm.” Zhulm (injustice) is not tolerated in Islam, regardless of who the perpetrator is.

  2. Failure to fulfill the objectives and purposes for which marriage was initiated. This can be utter incompatibility between the partners, which may be expressed by their irreconcilable differences in temperaments, likes, and dislikes.

  3. Marital infidelity. This can be a major cause for dissolution of marriage, for marriage is built on trust and confidence. Its main purpose is to preserve the chastity and modesty of those involved. Once this foundation is eroded and undermined and there is no chance to restore the same, then divorce is the way to go.

  4. Failure of the husband to provide. When the man, who is considered the provider and maintainer of the family, fails to shoulder his responsibilities and the wife decides that she cannot continue tolerating his shirking of responsibility, this is grounds for divorce.

For you the following two apply:

Khul’: It is a divorce issued by the husband in exchange of money. It happens when the wife requests her husband to divorce her, but he refuses unless she returns her dowry. Again, it is the right of the husband and is conditional to his approval.

Faskh; it is a marriage dissolution issued by a judge in response to a request by the wife and normally takes place against the will of the husband. However, the judge has to be appointed either by the leader of the Muslims, or by the Muslim community, or at least recognized as being an Islamic judge by the vast majority of the Muslim community. Merely being an imam neither suffices nor authorises him to dissolve marriages.

Khul is easier in my opinion so returning the dowry and asking for divorce should end the relationship but if he persists then you go for Faskh.

I am in no way commending Talaq (divorce) as it is most detestable lawful act in sight of Allah.

I pray Allah guides you and eases your way.

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answered 8588 abdul_wasay's gravatar image
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Asked: Apr 18 at 18:00

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