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I'm a 18 year-old girl who can't help but notice that she's turning into a such a bad muslim. I'm praying my salah until the last 5-10 minutes are left and sometimes I even miss prayers and pray them late on purpose, I don't wake up for my night prayers anymore. My attitude is becoming so bad too, I'm lashing out on people, swearing, and becoming so short tempered and impatient. I'm disrespecting my mother, I'm listening to disgusting music, I've stopped trying to learn the Quran, I'm watching filthy things on the internet having shameful thoughts and even saying bad things about the sahabas, things like "what have they done for me?" and "I don't care about them" I'm being hesitant with money and have stopped donating money.

I sin so much on a daily basis and I feel so guilty about my actions that I cry almost everyday about them. It's getting so depressed and sad, being at ease seems so impossible, I just feel suffocated with guilt. I repent but I don't do it with sincerity because I'm so lazy, I just say "I'm sorry Allah" and end it there.

How do I go back to how I used to be? I don't even know where to start because things started to go from bad to worse and then everything about me changed so fast. I've tried to change but I really can't.

Sorry if this may seem like a petty question/concern to you guys but I really need some advice on how to change myself because I'm beginning to hate myself.

asked 10 Cherry%20Blossom's gravatar image
1

Its a sign of faith that u feel guilty after sinning.

The best thing is to be read the seerah of prophet Muhmad (pbuh) who endured more than us. I am similar as well but i remember that this is nothing what our nabi had gone through

I am also inspired by Mufti Menk very good orator and this video might help you

http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=yC3ZCym556Q

(May 29 at 17:55) abdul_wasay ♦ abdul_wasay's gravatar image

Asalamualaykom :) Nothing is ever too late sister, Allah SWT is all merciful and forgiving. There are over 90 Ayahs showing kindness and forgiveness of Allah SWT in Quran. I quote only 2 of them for you:

Allah SWT says: 1)Chapter (39) sūrat l-zumar (The Groups) Say, "O My servants who have transgressed against themselves [by sinning], do not despair of the mercy of Allah. Indeed, Allah forgives all sins. Indeed, it is He who is the Forgiving, the Merciful." 2)"And whoever does evil or wrongs himself but afterwards seeks Allah's forgiveness, he will find Allah Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful". ( سورة النساء , An-Nisa, Chapter #4, Verse #110)

This shows that Allah SWT will forgive your sins, you need to repent sincerely and truthfully In Shaa Allah... Regarding your anger, the Prophet Muhammad PBUH did not leave us without an answer on how to stop becoming anrgy :)

He, SAWS said 1)"When you are angry, say أعوذُ بِٱللَّهِ مِنَ ٱلشَّيۡطَٰنِ ٱلرَّجِيمِ (A'udhu billahi min ash-shaytaan-ir-rajeem) 2)"Stay silent when you are angry" 3)"If you are angry and standing, sit. And if your anger still hasn't gone, lie down". Note: this may not be the exact translation, just a shortened version of advice the Prophet Muhammad SAWS gave. Take this advice In Shaa Allah and make sure you practice your patience and continue to ask for forgiveness...

The first thing you need to do in order to get back to being a sincere Muslim again, is abolish the bad you are doing. Stop doing Haraam, in any way. Just busy yourself with something else In Shaa Allah like reading, anything but not Haraam.

Regarding your prayer, you need to get back to pray. Prayer is the first thing Allah SWT will ask you about on the Day Of Judgment.

Allah SWT says: "What led you into Hell-Fire? They will say; 'We were not of those who prayed;' (The Noble Quran, 74:42-43)"

So it is VITAL you get back to praying. Some advice from me: just start praying continually for 2 days. Just 2 days, and u will just grasp the habit of doing it every day In Shaa Allah. And do the same for Reading Quran: once u do it one day, it becomes a habit

May Allah SWT guide you to get back to the straight path

In Shaa Allah, everything will be fine again sister ;) I hope this helped! Wasalamualykom

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answered 1006 Mazoozqwe's gravatar image
edited Jun 06 at 17:35

MashaAllah great answer. Jazakallah Khair. Note The hadith about the 15 punishment is fabricated according to some scholars. see http://islamqa.info/en/20897

(Jun 06 at 09:40) UmarAbdullah ♦ UmarAbdullah's gravatar image

Wa Iyaak, JazakAllah Khayr for the correction, I shall remember that for next time In Shaa Allah.

(Jun 06 at 11:10) Mazoozqwe Mazoozqwe's gravatar image
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Asked: May 29 at 16:58

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Last updated: Jun 06 at 17:35



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