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Asalamu alaikum I am 16 years old and I believe I am ready to get married. I feel like I need protection and support in this dunya. Is there any islamic knowledge that needs to be known before getting married? I mean I know the basics of Islam but not as much as I should. I don't want to be asked a question and embarrassed because I don't know the answer. I really want to get married and start building my family. But I also want to make sure I am as prepared for the married life as I can be. The person whom I have intentions on marrying, mother does not quiet like me. I want to be prepared for anything she asks me, so in addition to this question, what are the most common and typical questions to be asked by your intendent's parents?

asked 10 Amirah_Princess's gravatar image
1

16? you are a child. you shouldn't get married until at least 25. the human brain is not even fully developed until 25.

you need more knowledge of everything before you marry. do you not want to go to college?

(Jun 18 at 11:09) mikejm4 mikejm4's gravatar image

better than having boyfriend.

(Jun 18 at 11:12) abdul_wasay ♦ abdul_wasay's gravatar image

I do want to go to college. I'm not saying I'm getting married right this second but I'm thinking about it. It doesn't matter what age your brain develops for you to get married. My aunt got married at 14 & is currently still a married woman. As a Muslim marriage is something that is supposed to be done as soon as possible. I don't think there is a reason for me to wait. If you think I should wait, please tell me why.

(Jun 18 at 12:02) Amirah_Princess Amirah_Princess's gravatar image

He (mikejm4) is non muslim and he's from western culture they get married late.

Its good to be prepared as we dont have eternal youth in this world

(Jun 18 at 14:26) abdul_wasay ♦ abdul_wasay's gravatar image

How do you know when you're prepared then?

(Jun 18 at 14:30) Amirah_Princess Amirah_Princess's gravatar image

When you wre able to give rights of ur husband

(Jun 18 at 20:50) abdul_wasay ♦ abdul_wasay's gravatar image

yes, people have married at 14. even 9 if you believe some muslims' accounting of history. my reasoning is stated above. the frontal lobe of a teenagers brain is not fully developed.

also my father once explained to me that the more advanced the animal, the more time is needed in childhood. if you look at non-mammals like snakes or fish. they are born and then on their own. no mother's milk to feed them. no family structure to teach them. look at mammals, bears or lions, their young stay with them for at least a year to learn. we are much more complex than any other animal on the planet. we

(Jun 20 at 13:37) mikejm4 mikejm4's gravatar image

need extended childhoods to learn. our societies have become ever more complex. we understand a person doesn't just go from child to full grown adult. that is why the word adolescent was introduced. see you are still a little less than an adult.

the feelings you're experiencing right now, is what everybody experiences at your age. i thought i was a man at 16. then you live a bit longer and come to understand that you were foolish for such thoughts. that's just the way it is. as john couger once said, "hold on to 16 as long as you can, changes come around real soon make us women and men."

(Jun 20 at 13:47) mikejm4 mikejm4's gravatar image
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There are many websites but I recommend daruslam:

http://www.darussalam.com/index.php/women-section.html

Choose the book you like. I already chose woman's section. Salam.

link
answered 8588 abdul_wasay's gravatar image
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Asked: Jun 18 at 08:34

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Last updated: Jun 20 at 13:47

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