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Salam alaikum! I recently posted a question concerning verbal divorces. My husband has held similar words Over my head more than once but last week actually screamed more than once that we are divorced He meant it and I am so tired of the emotional turmoil that I have talked and talked about and Tried and tried to work out, evn after he has hit me and hurt my child more than once in an overboard Manor. Now, everyone is teling me I should take the kids back to our home where he is and won't Leave. I am scared of him and won't ever be able to shake that feeling. He has messed me up emotionally So bad that I could not imagine ever gtting near him again. My question is, if he is backing down And now wants me back, am I obligateed to return? I don't want to and in fact for the best and less Stressful and safest life for myself and kids, I will not return. But where do I stand religiously? Is it souly his choice? Also if I am not obligated, then what are his responsibilities and when is the divorce finail? After 3 months?

asked 312 asmaa2012's gravatar image
closed Apr 22 '13 at 09:42 believer ♦ 1.2k16 believer's gravatar image

The question has been closed for the following reason "Other" by believer Apr 22 '13 at 09:42


if he really has said divorce, then he means to separate you from his life, and once he says divorce, he will InshAllah never want you again. if you dont want to return to him back then its your choice.

answered 97218 TeenMuslim's gravatar image
Whether that divorce did take place or not(only you and your husband can determine its coming into effect), if you have decided that you cannot live with him you have a right to khula  i.e., you can demand a divorce from him, this is your Islamic right. However, let me make you aware that this matter entails intricacy of shariah from A-Z, you must therefore get in touch with an imam qualified in fiqah. It also entails the country's law where you live.
answered 42616 MAK's gravatar image

Unfortunately, most of the scholars are mistaken in divorce rules. Quran is clear about it. Read the Surats talking about divorce. Your husband can say the expression "you are divorced" 1 billion times if he wanted. This is not the way divorce occurs. It's pure Bidaa and nothing else.

answered 701 wakoubi's gravatar image

salaam,dont say anything for islamic problems by may contact to any center of fatwa for it...after that u decide r u devorced or not?plz refer quran and sahih hadith for asolution..

answered 281 mzajt's gravatar image

Take your kids and go to a place where you will be safe from this man. There is no obligation you have to stay with him after he has physically assaulted you and hurt your child. Go somewhere where he won't find you.

Pray to Allah for guidance. Go to a place where you can feel safe. Don't listen to the many people who are telling you to do something you don't want to do. In situations like these, the people who advise you against your better judgement are usually just close-minded idiots who just want to see some real-life drama.

Do what you feel is right in your heart. If it's still too confusing, go to a safe place with your child and then think about it. If this doesn't work, pray istiqara salaah in the right manner. Pray to Allah constantly to give you guidance.

There is no point living in fear, sister. If you're afraid of him, just go away from him. A man who doesn't know how to treat his wife and child is not a man you're obligated to stay with or even look at. He clearly doesn't deserve you.

answered 21227 HamzaC's gravatar image

But understand one thing, there is no rule in Islam that forces a wife to go back to an abusive husband. Remember that Allah loves you and would not want you to be hurt. If going back there hurts you, it's probably not what Allah wants for you either.

answered 21227 HamzaC's gravatar image

@HamzaC, brother this question was posted on Jul 07 '12. Why you have answered a question posted an year ago, of which the questioner will not get any benefit ?

(Apr 22 '13 at 09:41) believer ♦ believer's gravatar image

I saw a question, I answered it with my honest opinion. Just having a badge that says [closed] doesn't mean that the person asking the question has necessarily got the answer they needed.

Is there not even the slightest possibility that this person may come back and check if there's another answer? What if this answer was what they were looking for? What if this answer sorted out the whole big mess that the questioner's life was?

The 90 seconds you took to type out that meaningless, pointless redundancy could have been put to better use, don't you think?

Stop hating, start participating.

(Apr 26 '13 at 05:07) HamzaC HamzaC's gravatar image

Maybe another person with the same problem would do a keyword search on Google and end up here, reading this answer. More than one person can face the same problem, you know.

(Apr 26 '13 at 05:08) HamzaC HamzaC's gravatar image

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Asked: Jul 07 '12 at 00:38

Seen: 2,692 times

Last updated: Apr 26 '13 at 05:08

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