I'm from somalia and we Somalis do we care about Qabil.I married for about 6 years ago my mother was against my marriage because my husband was not the same Qabil like me, but he is from somalia like me ... My mom do not accept the continued carrying my husband's Qabil after 6 years plus 4 kids .. mom get mad at me for no reason, when my brother teach my kids a bad word and I'll say from, mom will take my brothers side... My mom treats my children and my brother's children diffrend .. I try very much to not care about it but it hurts especially now that my oldest son is 5 years and he understands a bit what ia going on .. Allahamdullilah my husband and I were bless with four wonderful sons and my mom says if I was married to some guy from the same Qabil as me I could make my Qabil grow instead of my husband's Qabil as my mother says he is MIDGAN .. I've talked to my mom about how I feel, and told her mom treat me like your daughter or break contact with me, because I do not feel good about it .. But mum istill treat me the same..Min mother has HIV, and my mom feeding my children with her hand, which she had herself in the mouth; plus mom let my kids drink the same glass as she has drukit water without washing .. Mum does not do that to my brother and sister's children .. I do not want to hurt my mother's feelings, but what she is doing is wrong .. my mom says all the time I am your mother and you get danbi if you do not listen or obey her, but how can I be quiet when my mother can infect my children with HIV .. how can I be quiet o obey my mother when mom hurts my children over my siblings' s barn.Ples help me what can I do to avoid all of this without hurting my mom or doing something haram for my mom .. My mom married 2 with my daddy and he wasnt the same qabil like my mumĀ“s and my mother's mother allah rahama told to my mum not to get marry too my father but my mum did it anyway, my mother's mother accepterarde my mother's marriage after maher ..

asked 92 Aaliyah's gravatar image
edited Jul 14 '12 at 17:34

Dear Aaliyah, I really pity your situation. The situation of having to see your children maltreated, of your mother's bias towards you and your children, of your brother teaching bad language to your kids, but a mother is a mother, no matter how cruel she is. Also, your mother feeding your kids with her hand wouldn't make your kids have HIV. HIV is transfered from one person to another through 'blood contact'. Your mother cannot give your children HIV unless her blood mixed with their's, which is highly impossible for their blood to mix by mere drinking from the same glass or by feeding them with her hand. It is wrong for your mother to be giving your siblings preferential treatment, and it is also wrong for you to tell her to break contact with you. She is your mother and Allah said we should obey our mothers. So by obeying her, you are also obeying Allah's command. And their is plenty of reward for obeying Him. Consider your situation as a trial from Allah and be patient. Verily, Allah is with those that are patient. May Allah bless you and your family.

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answered 1834 Sani%20Tj's gravatar image
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Asked: Jul 14 '12 at 17:32

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Last updated: Jul 15 '12 at 01:18


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