This is an update to my earlier question...
My husband was demanding a divorce from me without giving me any support
Also, as a new muslimah, i had no muslim family to turn to...
I made some terrible comprimises for the sake of ALLAH and
The situation of divorce was revoked on my husbands part, elhamduleelah
But now, it is me who is unhappy...
My husband does not pray or fast, and he will not help me learn or practice islaam
He gives me abuse and i want to know what to do ?????????????????
Do i continue to struggle at the cost of my deen?
Or is this stupid pride the reason i am listening to shaytan?
I have been making duaa, and istigharra..... i have the feeling in my heart of peace
Then i am yelled at or worse and i am useless for awhile......
I know now is the time to make a decision, i have no body to ask advice.....
I tried to ask my friend and she said "i think you and your husb have a strange life"
So i am scared to ask anyone i know, please help, gazzackALLAHhher
you must struggle for the Deen.
Supplicate and pray more to Allah, Indeed Allah is ever-ready to help his friends.And Allah is all aware of what you do.And ask Allah to guide you husband to right path Ameen.
And if they decide on divorce - then indeed, Allah is Hearing and Knowing.
Divorce is twice. Then, either keep [her] in an acceptable manner or release [her] with good treatment. And it is not lawful for you to take anything of what you have given them unless both fear that they will not be able to keep [within] the limits of Allah . But if you fear that they will not keep [within] the limits of Allah , then there is no blame upon either of them concerning that by which she ransoms herself. These are the limits of Allah , so do not transgress them. And whoever transgresses the limits of Allah - it is those who are the wrongdoers.
if you see that he cant keep you then divorce is the last option.
Thank you for these advice i love you all so much for the sake of ALLAH SUBHANNAHWATA'IILA ... i am not sure how to answer these questions about my husbands character because he is masri and i am american so the cultural differences between us have necessitated a huge space where love and trust should be.... i feel that only allah knows his heart....
salaam sister before deciding on any thing please confirm certain aspects of your husbands behavior for in case If you are decideing on asking for khulla from your husband please try to make sure that his ill behaviour towards you is not an influence of someone else and try understanding his attachment towards you it mig b possib he might be attached to you but when in rough times he is rude towards you by nature and when his mind settels he might be better husband and also sis please do some introspection like are you giving him reasons to showoff his anger and bust out no matter how small the reason mig be some men love shouting at their women and sister allah helps those who are patient and i guess you have good patiance in you but sis dont let this become a lifelong torture for you if you are going to decide consider all your options like his rudeness towards you might be anger of some other failures in his life or stress and things like that he might be just venting it out someday it might end but only allah knows when that day will come and sis if you ask allah's mercy and allah's refuge consistently (astag-fir-Allah) Allah will help you thats for sure he might help you with this man or he might get some one better than him for you so recite consistently (astag-fir-allah) inshaallah allah will help you prevail on your troubled times and sis pray to allah that if this is your test he is taking then help you with strength and will..
sahi bukhari Volume 8, Book 75, Number 333 : Narrated by Abu Huraira Allah's Apostle said, "When it is the last third of the night, our Lord, the Blessed, the Superior, descends every night to the heaven of the world and says, 'Is there anyone who invokes Me (demand anything from Me), that I may respond to his invocation; Is there anyone who asks Me for something that I may give (it to) him; Is there anyone who asks My forgiveness that I may forgive him?' "
Volume 8, Book 75, Number 356 : Narrated by Ibn Abbas The Prophet used to invoke Allah at the time of distress, saying, "La ilaha illal-lahu al-'Azim, al-Halim, La ilaha illal-lahu Rabbu-s-samawati wal-ard wa Rabbu-l-arsh il-azim." Volume 8, Book 75, Number 357 : Narrated by Ibn 'Abbas Allah's Apostle used to say at a time of distress, "La ilaha illal-lahu Rabbul-l-'arsh il-'azim, La ilaha illallahu Rabbu-s-samawati wa Rabbu-l-ard, Rabbu-l-'arsh-il-Karim."
Volume 8, Book 75, Number 350 : Narrated by Anas Allah's Apostle said, "When anyone of you appeal to Allah for something, he should ask with determination and should not say, 'O Allah, if You wish, give me.', for nobody can force Allah to do something against His Will. Volume 8, Book 75, Number 351 : Narrated by Abu Huraira Allah's Apostle said, "None of you should say: 'O Allah, forgive me if You wish; O Allah, be merciful to me if You wish,' but he should always appeal to Allah with determination, for nobody can force Allah to do something against His Will."
Volume 8, Book 75, Number 352 : Narrated by Abu Huraira Allah's Apostle said, "The invocation of anyone of you is granted (by Allah) if he does not show impatience (by saying, "I invoked Allah but my request has not been granted.")
And for many more haddes and invocations sister please check this link http://www.sahih-bukhari.com/Pages/Bukhari_8_75.php
sister culture is source of influence try finding out how men behave with their wifes in his culture it might help you a lil