assalumulakum it is very hard for me to lower my gaze i have listened to a few lectures talkin about the importance of lowering the gaze and i have improved a lot at lookinging at the opsite sex and lowering the gaze but i dont want to look at all. Eg. i go shopping wif my fwends, at the starting i lower my gaze and avoid looking at the opposite sex but at the end i do look, i feel bad but how should i stop looking and always lower my gaze and defeat my desires for the love of allah, help?????
This is how I helped myself lower my gaze.
May Allah give you strength and patience.
Assalaam dear sister,
Did you immediately lower your gaze and say “astagfirullah” / “audhobillahi minnash shaytaanir rajeem”? If you did, then alhumdulillah! But if at that very moment you struggled to lower your gaze and/or didn’t feel anything in your heart telling you that you shouldn’t be looking at what you’re looking at, then you should continue read the article or whatever.
Wallahi, lowering your gaze as a young Muslim is very difficult, especially since you have immodesty, pornography, and such lewdness running rampant in this society.
We have cable television (channels such as MTV, E!, and even the Disney channel!) openly promoting this type of behavior. Even the most popular video game out right now (GTA 4) is all about money, girls, cussing, and boosting (stealing) cars! (Ya Allah…)
When our hearts aren’t affected by this type of behavior, and we wonder why it’s so hard to lower our gaze, we should realize that the root of the problem isn’t our gaze, that’s just a symptom, but the root of our problem is that our hearts aren’t lowered in front of Allah (swt). And the way to lower your heart in front of Allah (swt) is by developing a strong connection with him through some of the suggestions that will be discussed below.
When we develop a connection with Allah (swt), we will find that our limbs (including eyes) will automatically reject anything that displeases Allah (swt).
Let us now take a look at some of the things we can do to get closer to Allah (swt). Here is a list of some practical suggestions, which will later be expounded upon individually:
■Work on performing (and perfecting) all of the obligatory acts of worship (praying 5 times a day, etc.).
■Develop a relationship with the Qur’an.
■Increase in the voluntary acts of worship.
■Hang out and spend time with good brothers/sisters
Inshallah I hope it helped alot.
Since this may be a habitual action you might performed everyday when you don't knew it as bad to do and get addicted to it.
But now when you knew that it is forbidden, you decreases the no of time you watch girls. But not fully as you have got addiction.
You will find difficulty in stoping this act as sudden.
keep trying and trying. And once a day will come when you have all stopped this. Offer five time Namaz(Salat), Read Quran. It will help you in lowering your gaze even more.
When you find yourself that you could not stop to see opposite sex, at that time recite some of Surah of Quran. It will restrict you automatically to lower your gaze.
brother you are trying keep trying.all good deeds are not easy to perfect so keep on Allah will bless u InsAllah